So this week has been a bit hard… Firstly, my children have been REALLY hard work-including the day I spend much of the afternoon at my GP surgery, being prodded around by several doctors, while the children swung from the curtains, attempted to destroy blood pressure monitors, emptied drawers, and generally made me want to die from shame. In fact, they’ve generally been like that all week, but at that time, I was really feeling the need to tell them in my best angry-but-trying-to-sound-kindly hiss, to just calm the heck down.

Anyway, as you may have guessed from the Drs visit, I haven’t been feeling too well this week. Despite that, I’ve still made it to Sh’bam, spin, HIIT, and body combat. But First, LET’S TALK ABOUT HIIT. My lovely friend convinced me to go along, ‘it’ll be great!’ she said, ‘there’s pair work, we can work together, it’s an amazing workout, better than circuits,’ she said. YOU WILL WANT TO THROW UP DURING THE WARM UP she DIDN’T say…. Jeez, I have given all the classes so far, a really fair shot, but I think it’s fair to say, I am 100% not going back to that. By the end of the next day, my legs were crippled, and I was still suffering the humiliation of being a hot and sweaty mess beside the rest of the class who were MACHINES, and feeling like I’d give myself a black eye from my gut flapping up to smack me in the face, during what felt like hours of ‘high knees.’

Food wise, I’ve stuck to all my usual meals pretty much the same as last week if you wanted to check out last week’s menu! But as well as being a bit under the weather, I’ve had one of those totally unmotivated weeks-you know-where you’re just a bit unmotivated with life in general? My appetite hasn’t been great, and I definitely feel like I’ve been running on empty-physically and emotionally. I was useless at combat today, and spent most of it kind of rolling around on the floor wishing I was at home (it was a very quiet class!) and it’s usually my favourite one.

(What I really wanted to be doing this week…)

I’m hoping I’ll have my mojo back a bit next week! So far, I’m not planning on making any changes to the food, although I might have to look at it again next week if I’m still at a plateau (because I haven’t lost anything this week,) but I have stayed the same, which is fine (I’m a bit disappointed, but trying not to be too hard on myself about it.)

lbs lost: Still 14…

What’s hurting: MY LEGS.

 

Update: Nearly a week after HIIT and my legs are still screwed!

*This is part of my ‘Cysters Are Doing It For Themselves’ series, about trying to kick some PCOS/insulin resistance ass. Other posts in this series can be found below.

PCOS Has Ruined My Life

A Change Is Gonna Come… Food And Exercise Changes I’m Making

Hey Cyster, Go Cyster, Soul Cyster, Go Cyster

Why Does PCOS Always Feel Like A Battlefield, A Battlefield, A Battlefield

Not So Fat Bottom Girl 

See you for next week’s update!

So, we all know that there was once a mum who lived in the south of England. We know that she was married to a Keifer Sutherland lookalike. We know that in her household, nobody ever listened to a fucking word she said, or ate anything she cooked. We know that she has PCOS, which she is currently trying to kick the crap out of its carb hating/insulin resistant ass. We know that she tries to do this by sometimes #shabammingtheshitoutoflife.

Well, today’s story finds her on her way to #bodycombattheshitoutoflife. Except she arrives at the gym to find she *dramatic gasp* hasn’t shaved her armpits…

She is faced with several choices:
1. Turn around and go home. There is no place for female body hair in the gym.

2. #bodycombattheshitoutoflife with her arms pinned to her side. (That would be well worth filming surely.)

3. #bodycombattheshitoutoflife at the back of the room, and hope she isn’t mistaken for a gorilla during any of the punching move busting.

She scratched her head, and thought: WWGGD. What Would Germaine Greer Do?

Well, she’d probably not be at the gym for a start. She wouldn’t give a shit who didn’t like her wobbly, insulin resistant ass-she’d change it for no fucker.

If she did go inside, the woman mused that Germaine would probably strip off to her bra and knickers, and march in there all pubes blazing, plaiting her leg and armpit hair as she went, while singing ‘cast off the shackles of yesterday’ as per Mrs Banks from Mary Poppins fame.

She’d probably use her bikini line hair to make a rope to gag anyone who passed comment on her hairy status.

She definitely wouldn’t wear any makeup, and definitely wouldn’t suffer the same the woman once had, of going to a spin class with last nights makeup on, and getting to the car to find most of the mascara residing just under her eyebrows, and salty sweat streaks running through her foundation.

But, as the woman was a disgrace to feminists everywhere, she chose to ignore #WWGGD What Would Germaine Greer Do? And she went home. Oh well, at least it saved the double whammy embarrassment of possibly letting out a bit of wee during a round house, plus being mistaken for a gorilla.

On her way home she was telephoned by the Keifer Sutherland lookalike.

“Guess what just happened?????” He said, sounding horrified.

“What dear, it sounds terrible,” she replied.

“A client just said ‘you remind me of someone. Someone famous,’ and I said (probably with a swaggy point and a wink) I know, is it Keifer Sutherland, I get it all the time (probably a smirk in there at this point) and she said ‘no, I was thinking of DONALD Sutherland-his father’…”

The bit of wee that didn’t get to come out at body combat, then escaped at that moment, during massive amounts of giggling and snorting that ensued…😂😂

The moral of the story? Invest in a cap sleeved gym t-shirt so that you can indulge yourself in never shaving your armpits while having the added benefit of not being mistaken for a gorilla while basking in your own hairiness. And also, that at a certain age, you will come to resemble the father of the celebrity you love that everyone mistakes you for, and it will be really bloody funny to your younger wife…!!    

No, I didn’t meet marmalade down in old New Orleans, and I definitely didn’t eat any, because it contains too much sugar…!!

Anyway, I’m really running with the song theme for the titles of these posts, I’m not sure why, probably mainly for my own amusement!

So what exercise have I done this week?

Sh’Bam-this was entirely new to me, and I didn’t have a clue what it was all about. The description on the website was vague too. So, it’s like a Latin American dance class, with a few jumps thrown in for good measure. I love dancing, and I enjoyed it as a fun way to get moving, but it didn’t leave me feeling like I wanted to die, so I probably won’t do it regularly.

Spin-urgh… Still makes me feel a little vommy, but works, so I will keep going!

Circuits-I wasn’t a huge fan last week, but I can see that when I’m stronger, this will be a brilliant HIIT style all over body workout.

Body combat-I have just been this morning, I absolutely love this one!

Omnia-a torturous 45 minutes of weights/pulley things, planks and other core stuff. I could barely feel my legs afterwards. There was a (phew) waiting list for this next week, so hopefully there won’t be any space…!! (joke, kind of…)

I don’t have anything new planned for next week, I’m doing the same mixture of the above.

Food diary:

I’ve kept a diary of what works and what doesn’t-my husband is the main source of stuff not working! He wants to eat the same as me (I’m already making different stuff for the children usually, so making something different for me and Mr W is just ridiculous,) but he is just as fussy as them…

Friday 13/01/17

Breakfast: Quinoa pear porridge-this was AWFUL!! Sorry quinoa, I like you as a savoury food, but even pear couldn’t save your earthy taste from making a rank breakfast!

Lunch: smoked salmon and scrambled egg-what’s not to like!

Dinner: Vegan Mexican chilli bowl with lentils. Mr W hated it! Although I actually loved it…

Saturday 14/01/17

Breakfast: Scrambled egg and avocado-yum!

Lunch: Tinned tuna and steamed veg-a bit boring, but ok.

Dinner: Chicken lentil curry-definitely a hit with both of us!

Sunday 15/01/17

Breakfast: Scrambled egg and steamed veg-yum!

Lunch: Carrot sticks and home made houmous-this was ok.

Dinner: Lemon and chive courgetti with mustard chicken-spiralised courgette in a paleo lemon and chive sauce, with baked mustard chicken-this was really good!

Monday 16/01/17

Breakfast: Cacao and coconut paleo granola (made with cacao nibs, so no sugar, and nuts instead of oats) this was reallllllllllllly good!

Lunch: pumpkin soup-also really nice!

Dinner: Chunky veg and lentil soup-we both liked it!

Tuesday 17/01/17

Breakfast: Cacao and coconut granola (I made a big batch, so had it for breakfast for a few days)

Lunch: Pumpkin soup-homemade, it was nice!

Dinner: King prawn lentil curry-definitely a favourite!

Wednesday 16/01/17  

Breakfast: Cacao and coconut granola

Lunch: Pumpkin soup

Dinner: Squashetti and vegan meatballs-spiralised butternut squash, tossed in oil and thyme, and ‘meatballs’ made from lentils and black beans, and a homemade tomato sauce on the top. I actually predicted that Mr W would hate this (the ‘meatballs’ looked grey and really unappetising,) but he loved it, and I think it’s the best meal so far.

 

Thursday 17/01/17

Breakfast: Cacao and coconut granola

Lunch: salmon and avocado on rye bread (giving rye bread a try as it’s low yeast and low carb, but may omit it in the future.)

Dinner: Chicken and butternut squash fritters with salad-this was another really nice one!

Today:

So far I’ve had paleo nut porridge with almond milk for breakfast, which was nice.

Pounds lost: Only 1 lost this week… But in the reading of mainly depressing information that I do, I did read that when eating well and exercising hard, muscle is built quicker than the fat is burned, leading to a gain, or a plateau-apparently it’s the biggest cause of people giving up in first few weeks. The balance should eventually shift, to where the muscle is built at a slower, more even rate, and the fat loss begins to show. Fingers crossed! This might not be the same for me, because PCOS is a dick, but I’m hopeful!

I’m also using the My Fitness Pal app to track food too. Then I can input accurately, by actual weights, the food I’m eating, and the exercise done. And it shows how easy it is to go over your calorie allowance too-there have been days where I feel like I’ve eaten very little, but by time I’ve hit ‘day complete’ on the app, I only would’ve had about 180 calories left-just goes to show that adding in a couple of glasses of wine (sob,) could easily take you 500 or so calories over your allowance, and you have no idea.

Sorry, I’ve been rubbish at taking pictures of what I’ve been eating-I’ll try and remember to do this next week!

 

I was booooooooooooorn by the river…! Ok, as I’d used that song title in the title of this post, I really felt I had to throw that in there! And as this series is called Cysters Are Doing It For Themselves, I also feel the need to carry on with the song title theme!

Anyway, I’m writing this from my bed, in a sweaty mess still, after going to body combat at the gym. I know, it’s gross to be in bed with sweaty gym stuff on, but I am going to change the sheets when I’m done. So anyhoo, body combat. I loved it-but I thought I would, because back in the day (when I went to the gym every day-gosh, can you imagine?) body combat was my favourite of all the exercise classes. And my gym also does virtual classes, which, judging by the fact there’s only ever 3 or 4 people there, are really quite unpopular. I can see why, I suppose it’s not much different to doing an exercise DVD in your front room, and going to an instructor led class is a lot more personal, and probably more motivational. But while I’m getting my fitness back up, I’m liking the virtual classes, because at least there’s space, sprung floors, and less self consciousness about everyone around me being super fit and super toned.

So body combat is a win! My friend also dragged me to circuits this week-NEARLY DIED. But refused to die (well, not complete the class,) as I was adamant I was going to push my physical limits, and not look like an unfit try hard who should be laughed out because they can’t cut it (oh yes, that is me really, but I was damned if others were going to know that!) It was really hard, and not my usual type of thing, but I am going to keep going.

Spin! Oh yes, spin, you absolute fucker! I’m still persevering with this too, because although this is another one that is like the reaper, trying to kill me, it is such a brilliant calorie burner, and all around fitness improver.

I am trying Sh’bam, and Total Toning next week, as well as the others above-I know…!

That’s that’s this weeks exercise talked about, lets talk about FOOD!!!! A while ago, I tried the paleo approach to eating. It’s incredibly low GI, and cuts out most foods that are considered to be gut/digestive tract irritants. Essentially, it’s perfect for people with insulin resistance. BUT, I do find it VERY restrictive, and as absolutely everything has to be made from scratch, it can be just one massive faff.

So I’m using some principles of paleo (although a lot of people who follow paleo are like Baby Led Weaning Puritans-there is no give or take, and you absolutely can’t call your diet paleo if you aren’t following every single rule.) Well, come get me puritans, because I’m following your rules, but I will still be eating lentils and quinoa (because I like them, and I need fibre.) At the moment I’m drawing inspiration from 3 cookbooks-Juli Bauer and George Bryant’s The Paleo Kitchen, Dale Pinnock’s Diabetes: Eat Your Way To Better Health (The Medicinal Chef) because an insulin resistant diet is the same as a diabetic one, and Niomi Smart’s Eat Smart. Yes, I was dubious about getting the book of a young Youtuber, but my brother (a ridiculously avid #cleaneater,) recommended it to me, and it’s actually amazing!

 

So here is a list of changes I’m making:

Everything organic where possible.  Can be expensive, but a lot of PCOS is to do with hormone imbalance, so minimising hormones in food by buying organic, seems a good way to start.

No Dairy. I’m using coconut or almond milk instead-they are fine to me! BUT everyone knows how much I like cheese-it’s only a matter of time before some Pilgrims Choice will have to be consumed! I was thinking of looking into dairy free cheese (Niomi Smart recommends something called ‘nutritional yeast’, which sounds rank, but I haven’t tried it,) as a cheese replacement, but I’m sure it’ll have the same affect as drinking non alcoholic wine during pregnancy-it’ll just leave me frustrated and angry, wanting the real thing.

Cutting out carbs and some grains. So everything becomes courgetti, squashetti, etc. Vegetables are spiralised the to within an inch of their lives, as a replacement for pasta. Favourite vegetables for this include sweet potato, butternut squash, courgette, carrot, and celeriac. My favourite so far, is butternut squash, tossed in oil and thyme. And like I said earlier, no grains except lentils and quinoa.

Being careful with some fruits. Tropical fruits are out, and I’m sticking to apples, pears, and a handful of berry fruits as the GI of other fruits can be too high. A lot of the desserts in the above books, use dates and other very sweet fruits, as sweeteners, but I’m avoiding these too, and using a small amount of maple syrup if I need something sweetened.

No alcohol… I know, impossible when you have kids, right? So I will still be having some occasionally, just not the nightly glass or two I was having…! And when I go out with friends too, because I refuse to be a diet bore, and I need to live a little!

I’m leaving it there for today, but will doing a breakdown of what I’ve been eating-what is totally rank, and what is really fab!

Stats for this week:

Headaches: less frequent

Muscles in agony: Too many to mention.

Weight lost: 6lbs… Not a bad start, and a lot more than I was expecting. Although I am expecting it to slow down from here…